Recently, i had the opportunity to reconnect with someone i’d known 30 years ago. His introduction to “bat” will be here. His first taste of this blog will come from this post. i wrote something similar for Captain Chunky and some of this info is in my “Whatza wawbat” page as well.
Today? i introduce myself to someone who knew me in another time and another place… with another name and decidedly different notions of what was right and wrong… a person who – i have no doubt- would have joined hands with me in our school uniforms to pray for my eternal soul (had we known then what would have become of us).
i’ve mentioned Whitman before while blogging and that is a good way to start.
“i contain multitudes”
i am a feminist and yet?
i call a Man, “Master”
What lives between His legs is of little consequence to that power exchange dynamic.
my slavery… the process of accepting that part of myself and becoming so vulnerable and trusting with another human being? It has been the single most liberating thing i have ever experienced in my life.
i have been the victim of domestic violence as well as sexual violence and yet?
i enjoy pain and even pain mixed with my sex.
Ah, but that is consensual pain… hell… sometimes i beg for it.
i play with individuals that respect my limits and boundaries.
i am a kinky fuck and indulge in my fair share of fetishes.
i play as safely as i can. i listen to my body. i educate myself about risks and take precautions.
i like to dance along the edge of pleasure and pain. i embrace them both.
i am not heterosexual.
i am a hedonist.
i fuck ethically.
i want it all and i want it now (cue Queen) because all i have is now. i want to taste and touch … to experience… to grow.
i am polyamorous.
i love ethically.
i am blessed beyond belief by love and support and passion and purposeful relationships.
i am agnostic and yet?
i am a spiritual being both in and out of bed.
i walk the Path of Qadishtu. i am Q.
Chaos magic is my most comfortable fit in the realm of the supernatural.
i vibe to buddhist tenets and find that Buddhism is a good lens through which to make ethical choices in my life.
i am not a Christian, but so many of my formative years were spent in that faith system, the teachings of Christ are inexorably woven into my moral fiber. i attempt – on a continuous basis – to rid my mind and heart of the teachings of those who purported to be his followers, however.
i am smart and well-educated.
The choices i make in life are with thought and feeling.
Are you worried?
Ask questions if you have them.
If my way of being is beyond your scope of acceptance? i won’t take it personally. i will respect your life and your choices.
Honor my choices. Honor my need to keep those choices from the prying eyes of those who love me but do not understand. Respect that there are those who do not love me and would choose to marginalize me based on these choices.
i am not the least bit ashamed of who i am or what i do.
This life i am living? This person i have become and am becoming?
It is a kind of magic.