Crystal Ball by J.W.Waterhouse

my time is needed elsewhere, but i am thinking of a space… a room… and the fact that i’ve shared some of the most precious moments of my recent life… in that room. The space has become part theater, part home-away-from-home…  part sanctuary.

i’ve a problem untangling religion from my life – so foundational was it in my childhood, and today i am feeling worshipful not of god but of Man. There was a time when i would scarcely have acknowledged this to myself – let alone given it voice – fearing the wrath of that angry god… so angry… so vengeful.

But today, i give it voice… this nearly imperceptible yet oh-so-powerful shift that makes me desire – to do for someone else – to be for someone else… not to subjugate my will, but rather to relinquish control. i am not certain why that distinction is so important to me… but it is.

Leonard Cohen’s If it Be Your Will